Hello HN,

I'm feeling like a complete failure, and aside from my parents who are thousands of miles away, I have literally no friends and social contacts. I don't know why I'm posting this here, but you're the only community that has managed to keep me engaged throughout the years.

I moved to Vancouver, BC to work at a Big N company. I moved alone, because my SO was still finishing college. The plan was to stay in Vancouver for ~2 years, then move to the US under an H-1B or L-1 visa. When I was about to move, my SO got an offer to work in Vancouver at the same company. A remote relationship wasn't working well, and I decided to give up on moving to the US to stay with her in Vancouver for 2 more years, at which point we'd move together to the US.

I quit that job for a 50% pay increase at another Big N company. I "lost" every friend I had - all of them moved to the US. It wasn't an issue for me, because my SO provided me all the social/emotional support I needed, and she kept in touch with my friends anyway.

After over 7 years, we decided to break up. She wanted a polyamorous relationship (I was ok with the occasional hookup, but she wants another real relationship now), and I felt insecure about that. We couldn't reach an agreement, so we're now parting ways.

Also for the past 5 years I've been trying to work on side projects, something that could allow me to work on my own. I'm still in Canada on a work permit, which forces me to work for my current employer, or leave Canada when it expires. I'm unsatisfied with my job, been overworking and haven't got the recognition I wanted.

I feel like I lost everything. I'm still grateful I have a job, but I just don't have anything else going on in my life. I really need a friend right now.