The EU has determined that non-EU companies providing digital goods/electronic supplied services to EU customers must collect VAT [1]. To do so, the company must register itself under a "special scheme" in one of the EU member states (such as the UK [2]), to which the company must file VAT returns for all it's EU private customers (VAT-registered businessess will handle it on their own on a reverse-charge scheme [3]). The country in which the company is registered is called a "member state of identification", and will be responsible for forwarding the collected tax to the country where the service was consumed [4].
AFAIK, there are still many questions around the fact that if you are not under EU's jurisdiction they can't enforce their rules on you, but things might get complicated when/if you decide it's time to have an office in the EU.
If your company is not based in the EU and is providing services to EU private customers, are you collecting VAT?
[1] http://ec.europa.eu/taxation_customs/taxation/vat/how_vat_works/e-services/index_en.htm
[2] http://customs.hmrc.gov.uk/channelsPortalWebApp/channelsPortalWebApp.portal?_nfpb=true&_pageLabel=pageOnlineServices_ShowContent&id=HMCE_CL_001460&propertyType=document
[3] http://www.hmrc.gov.uk/vat/managing/international/imports/importing.htm
[4] http://eur-lex.europa.eu/LexUriServ/LexUriServ.do?uri=CELEX:32003R1798:en:NOT