This may cost me what little rep I have here, but I'm honestly curious to see the reaction.

Recent uncomfortable events have caused me to realize that, in order for relative strangers (or sometimes acquaintances, or even friends) to happily party together, it might be best if certain terms are affirmatively agreed upon before partying. Or, more broadly-speaking, before more than familiar fraternization. Meaning, before two or more parties spend an extended period of time in shared accommodations or close quarters. Pushing this to the extreme, you might say these could be some fundamental principles of any social contract - though I admit that's quite a reach. I'm not trying to supplant Hobbes, here.

In light of the aforementioned events, I offer to all a proposed contract for "assent before partying." Comments and advice are welcomed from all corners.

I am attempting to Keep Shit Real, so you'll most likely note some exaggerated colloquialisms in the language of the contract. I am no lawyer - merely a programmer who enjoys partying. But I am emphatically trying to Keep Shit Plain And Simple (i.e., colloquial).